The unpopular opinion of a lecturer has become viral after Twitter user @AnnaSoeraya shared the lecturer’s statement in a tweet several days ago.
“Lecturer kata kalau nak buat Master kena ada tunang. Kalau nak sambung PhD kena ada suami. Kalau takdak nanti mesti tak laku dah…”
Haaa… tak laku sebab apa tu?
Cuba baca – dan hadamkan. pic.twitter.com/uZFjZbSd0s
— 🗺HELENA (@AnnaSoeraya) October 6, 2018
“The lecturer said women who wish to pursue their Masters, they have to be engaged, if they wish to pursue their PhD, then they must be married. If they aren’t then they will not be marketable after because they will be labelled as old maids. My lecturer also said that those who pursue their PhD usually only want to become lecturers. And if you don’t end up being a lecturer, who would even know that you have a PhD?”
“So, my lecturer’s advice for women who say that they want to focus on their studies first and not think about marriage yet, is: ‘Please don’t do this. You need to be married before you become an old maid.’ There are also those who claim that the reason they aren’t married is because they haven’t met their soulmates. Well, if you don’t actively search for him then of course you won’t find him. Not everyone finds their soulmate without putting in any effort. Thanks.”
The tweet garnered a lot of feedback with many disagreeing with the unknown lecturer.
Apa benda dengan mentaliti macam mana? For sure I can’t adapt. Jodoh ajal semua tu Allah dah tetapkan bila. Lagipun sukahati la perempuan tu nak kahwin bila sekali pun ataupun tak nak kahwin sekalipun. Dia ada hak untuk tentukan life dia bukan makcik makcik bawang.
— Bieya (@adbieaa) October 6, 2018
You don’t need a man to continue your Master/PhD, you just need interest and willingness to study babe
— R̷̨͓̙̦͇͙͔̎̑̍͒̾̏̈́i̷̧͓̘͙̲̩̗̹͚͊̎̍͘̕͜z̴̢͔͚̤̳͒̾̌̾͊͛̓̒͒ (@RizWatteva) October 6, 2018
Get yourself a man yang always support you whatever your decision is. Memang kita kena pilih satu je ke? Nak kahwin ke nak further study? Tak boleh ke buat dua2 sekali? Plus, macam lah kalau dah kahwin nanti dapat pulak sambung masters/phd. With all those responsibilities lagi
— Blair Waldorf (@ellyysri) October 6, 2018
The first verse of Quran says “Read.”
— Ira Hazman Wong (@irahazmanwong) October 7, 2018
Zaman bila punya pemikiran ni? seru jodoh khwin dh smp, time degree pun khwin. Tp kalau dh mmg tkde jodoh tkkn khwin, apa mslh? Knp perlu skeptical. I cannot laa. Pg matilah andartu ke tk janji pandai and boleh tanggung diri sndr. Sudah. Its nothing to do w belajar smp mana pun.
— itseddritory (@_itseddritory) October 7, 2018
Who gave you the right to label a person as “x laku” just bcs she aint married? Nobody has the right to label anyone anything. Plus, if anything, a girl’s successes should not be overlooked just because of something we dont even have control over.
— uWuLani (@lanisbrina) October 7, 2018
PhD lagi best drpd kahwin. Have you MET a Malay man? Lol.
— Joja (@cudimepie) October 7, 2018
Buat PhD sebab nak jadi lecturer? Patut la Malaysia ramai professor kangkung.
Buat PhD untuk kembangkan ilmu. Discover something yang sebelum ni takde orang tahu.
— Azman Abdullah (@azmanrocks) October 7, 2018
“Kau kena kahwin sebelum kau jd anak dara tua” – as if anak dara tua tu adalah benda paling keji boleh jadi kat perempuan. Does marriage is all what women have to live for? This type of mindset is very the 40s ya. Women during the 40s bersungguh perujangkan hak wanita. Now this-
— 👻Huda👻 (@HudaAsilah) October 7, 2018
Hmmmmm… Kalau dah jodoh takkan ke mana… Kalau dah bodoh pun takkan ke mana…
— AngahFyruz As-Shamsy (@mfs7875) October 8, 2018
Even Dr Nur Amalina Che Bakri, the young woman who scored 17A1s in SPM in 2004, had something to say about this lecturer’s statement:
But hey, good thing is that educated and successful women SHOULD be wise enough to choose a partner who will support and love her unconditionally, through thick and thin, gain new experience and, teach each other new things. So those intimidated men shouldn’t worry.
— Dr. Amalina (@DrAmalinaBakri) October 9, 2018
We don’t deny that being married is a good thing, but do you think people should rush into marriage just for the sake of being married? And is being married the only measure of success in life? Discuss!